Foundations of BDSM as they apply to D&s and M/s

Define the components of BDSM:

  • Disparity of power
  • Penetration
  • Engagement

Disparity of power

Where does power come from? Create a list: e.g., determination, purpose, lust, skill, ...


The very vital element.

How do we effect our partner?

What do we do that makes them feel us?

What do they feel? As doms? As subs?


What is its role in relationships?

Images and archetypes (psychology).

How can someone have a powerful or intense scene at a play party with someone they have only just met?

The multiple relationships in a relationship:

  • Real-self-to-real-partner,
  • Real-self-to-role-partner (break down possible here),
  • Role-self-to-real-partner (breakdown also possible here),
  • Role-self-to-role-partner, self-to-relationship,
  • Etc.


  • The wrong foundations
  • Things which can go awry
  • Deception, con artists, and naiveté
  • Lack of knowledge of self
  • Projection, identification, and denial (psychology)
  • Poor communication leading to growth in different directions

What can diminish power? Or, what can diminish the effects of power or the power we actually feel? Decreased lust? Goals being achieved?

What can diminish penetration?  Trust issues? What sort of trust issues?

What can diminish engagement? Distance? Assumptions?

Last modified: Sunday, 10 March 2013, 8:49 AM